The War Horse

“Alive” is relative. “Why did you fall asleep at the wheel?” “Why were you so tired?” “Were you just getting off shift?” “Had you been up all night?” All valid questions, asked ad nauseum. My answer: I shrug my shoulders. It’s a pitfall of being a juggler, front and center, in the largest ongoing three-ring circus in the world—the Covid-19 pandemic.

After a crazy shift in the E.R., I sat on the couch with my wife, Leslie, watching the news. As Tucker Carlson was talking about the coronavirus like every other TV reporter, my wife turned to me and asked, “Are you all right?” I gave her my standard reply, “Yeah, babe, why?” She looked at me and said, “You look empty.” At that moment I realized I was doing a piss-poor job of masking what was going on inside my head.

By Johnnie L. Gilpen Jr., MS, MHS, PA-C CAQ (EM) NRP https://thewarhorse.org/you-have-not-seen-the-last-of-these-marines/ Please click on the link above to read the story. You Have Not Seen the Last of These Marines  was the first of three reflections I wrote for The War Horse Journal (WHJ) ( https://thewarhorse.org/ ). In 2019, I was selected as a War Horse Combat Medic and Corpsman Writing Fellow. The War Horse Journal’s Seminar for Veterans and Military Families is more t